We spend a lot of time replaying what-if scenarios and how things could have gone differently. There are two things you must realize when it comes to challenges and learning to embrace them. First, it will never be the same. Second, that is a beautiful truth.
If you have ever read a book like "The Secret", or paid any attention to the law of attraction, you may slowly begin to realize, things that happen to us are manifested by our thoughts. What you focus on expands.
Sound crazy? Here are some examples. About a year ago I had been thinking about selling my car. I thought about it every day and never took the next steps to proceed. It seemed like too much work. About a week ago, I totaled my car. In the moment, I thought many things. Including that this could be the worst thing that has ever happened to me. My insurance would go up, the people were pissed at me, my family would be pissed at me, this is such an inconvenience, I can't deal with this, I don't have time. Everyone was okay and thank God for that. After two days of chaos and getting things figured out, I finally had some time to sit down and processed what had happened. I remembered thinking about how high my payments had been and how expensive full coverage was. I was oddly relieved at the thought of not having to pay them anymore. I also thought about how I had put it in my goals to go a whole year without a vehicle, conveniently I do not have one. I remembered thinking about how much I wanted to sell my car and move on. I didn't have to do that. I was getting a check from my insurance company for the remaining value of what was left! I let go of the outcome and embraced what was possible.
About a week after the car accident, I left my job. Sort of by choice, sort of not, a bit torn. Again, this was the worst thing that could have happened! I was going to go broke, no one would hire me and I was not valued (so ridiculous, but our minds can be...) I had been debating quitting my job for months, and now I had this big check from my insurance company so that I could take some time to figure things out!
These two examples are rather small compared to challenges that we will face in our lives. But in the moment, every challenge seems large and overwhelming. When we zoom out and look big picture, we see these moments of transition are usually the moments we can thank for allowing us to develop and grow.
In the initial moments of encountering our challenges, we face all of our demons. The fear, anxiety, comparison, shit we are horrible sort of feelings set in. In the clarity of space and time, we begin to realize how the universe continues to work in our favor if we can continue to shift our perspectives. The thoughts that we have and continue to feed, will manifest themselves in the most unorthodox ways.
Sadly even loss of friendship or family, could be what allowed you to be free and untied to move closer to your destination. Please do not take this the wrong way, but it can be so powerful to shift perspective around things, and find the slightest amount of gratitude in each event that takes place in your life. How can we find the good in all of this? What allows to move beyond the healthy grieving, through gratitude and into light? We must mourn but we also must recover, that is what anyone would want for you.
When you ask a mountaineer why they climb, they would probably speak about overcoming fear, sharpening focus, building strength and character. We must stop seeing our challenges as dead ends and as the mountain summit that hides beyond the clouds. Use this visualization to fuel your determination to succeed anyway focusing on the benefits you stand to gain in the process.
If you learn to see your mountains as a welcome opportunity to stretch and grow beyond where you are now, you will never encounter a mountain that can't be climbed. Allow your gratitude to help you climb. When you are grateful for the experiences that strengthen you, the journey is worth all the while when you are standing at the top in your strength.
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